How do we know anything?

What it means to know something at very fundamental level? An atom knows about another atom? Knows about itself? Certain energy state gets known to an atom? What gets known? To whom? And what's the point of knowing after all? There is nothing that an atom can know about another atom. The atom has to know itself first. But what an atom should know about itself? Its own state or structure? Can knowing this for an atom make a difference in its state? Else how would atom know it has known something. It must preserve the knowledge about itself in its own state, altering its existing state. If it does then the atom's knowledge about its state goes inconsistent with its own new state which is preserving the knowledge. Contradiction! So puny little atoms can't really know anything? Can they? Who knows then, if not atoms?

How do we remember? Some atomic or sub-atomic nuclear phenomena preserves sounds, images, sensatation, smells, perfumes? What does it mean for a nuclear particle to remember anything? Or a group of nuclear particles? Do they know what they are remembering? Who knows?

What is this damn consciousness?

I am me.

I am aware that I am thinking of being me.

I am aware that I have self awareness of being myself.

I am aware that I am self-aware of my self-awareness of being myself.

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Where does it end?

You are here to get confused, and over and over again!

Our brains are mess of nerves, and shit load of random looking disoriented connections. Now what can come out of it? More mess! The clarity of thought is our ultimate illusion. Brains have evolved to help us survive across dark and ice ages. They were never subjected for development of clarity of thought. So unless we are fighting for survival or a goal, confusion prevails. Brain doesn't know what to do.

Brains are ultimate learning machines. They would just learn anything that they come across, whether it is right or wrong, irrespective. The brain is truly impartial. Unless you consciously interfere with it to filter learning to good or bad things. Its like a devil running around a pole to get some work.

So as long you are not moving towards a goal, you will learn a lot of junk. Because brain is not subjected to its real trial. The junk learning is just side effect of brain not going to sleep.

Thus, confusion is not bad. Its is the natural, normal state of the brain. You don't always move towards a goal. The confusion is the state of relaxation. Enjoy it. There is plenty of it and free!

Your Mind and Body is an expression of urges

An ocean of urges inside me. Like all types of fishes swimming in the free ocean. Some irresistable and unstoppable, jumping out of me, like the killer whales arch out of the waters. Some deep, and suppressed lurking on my ocean floor. Some moving up and down with impatience. Some Big like blue whales, some small like tuna, all created by my subconscious. Chaotic playground isn't it? Each trying to fulfill itself. Can I do anything but just help keep them lined up in order and magnitude, and just to be fair with each one? And at the same time be aware that manifesting them is not so culture friendly. And if I don't they eat me inside. Feeling heaving with urges! Like an entire ocean weight in my brain.

Criss-cross they, and override my culture-trained mind and tamed body. Bringing with them, flood of wild thoughts. And I am no longer the human body. Someone has gotten inside me. Body rebels like a caged animal. The superficial culture coats erodes smoothly. And I am naked in my mind. Nothing feels sooooo good. To absolutely act out. Erupting, Expressing, and doing so with intense energy. Which is what the urges are. Energy seeds locked up in you wanting to bloom out.

What is the mind meant for after all? To fulfill all the urges. Any other better pleasurable pursuit than this? :)

Problem of Space!

What is space? What could constitute space in which everything exists? Is there a place where space doesn't exist? Is any point in space exactly same as any other point? We have no clue! where are we in space? What is the smallest unit of space? Are there more dimensions in space then just 3? Which we cannot sense? And what could exist in those dimensions? And what additionaly exists in 3 dimensions which we cannot sense? Does space has absolutely nothing if it has vaccuum? Atleast there is space! But what it is?

What are the limits of space? If it is limiteless, why it is? And if it is limited, then what's outside it?

Anything that travels must travel in space. Heat, light, sounds, and even thoughts waves. Is there anything which cannot travel in space? Can space travel itself? Or space is always fixed? What are the properties of space?

Creater, Destroyer, And Preserver, They are Dancing in Delight forever!

Someone must create atleast the first atom, (of hydrogen/helium) necessary to create stars. Who did? Let's say The Creator.

Someone must destroy atoms back to whatever they were created from, to obey conservation and to put check on creation. Who does? Let's say The Destroyer.

Someone must preserve existing creation from being destroyed. Who does? Let's say The Preserver.

Now who created the Creator? Can creator be created? If yes, then we need a super creator to create the creator. So creator cannot be created. And since creator cannot be created he is not subject to destruction like his creation. Hence creator can neither be created or destroyed. And thus not even subject to preservation, because it cannot be destroyed.

Who created the destroyer? Can destroyer be created? If yes, then destroyer is no better than rest of creation, and is subject to destruction like rest of creation. But Destroyer should be someone who cannot be destroyed, because if he can be, then we need a Super Destroyer to destroy the destroyer. Hence, Destroyer cannot be created or destroyed either. And thus not even subject to preservation, because it cannot be destroyed.

Who created the preserver? Cannot be creator because preserver cannot be destroyed. If he were to be destroyed, then how will he preserve the creation? If preserver were to be created, we need a super preserver to preserve preserver himself! We cannot have a super preserver for preserver. Hence preserver cannot be created, or destroyed.

These three devils or angels, sustain the melodrama, and orchestrate all reality to their whims, and fantasies. Each independent of the others, and yet their actions harmonize into this beautiful universe!

Without creator, there is no creation and thus no need for preserver or destroyer.
Without destroyer, there would be no new creation, stalling the creator.
Without preserver, there would be no manifestation of creation. Creator and destroyer would almost crash into each other.

Creation and Destruction give birth to each other. In creation, there are seeds of destruction, and in destruction seeds of new creation. Nothing lasts forever except for the delightful competition amongst the creator, the preserver, and the destroyer!

Tinker with FreeWill?

Am I given freedom of natural thought? Can I pause, play, rewind? No!! What can I do? When I think, is it me who thinks? Who thinks after all? Is it some electron energy level changes in atoms? Or some hyperspace changes within me? How thinking happens? If my conscious will is not involved in that, how can I be free? Else if I am free, then my conscious will has the ability to affect the atoms responsible for thought.

I am free to believe that I am free. But am I really?

There must be some thought-generator mechanism inside us. We just can't be without them. Resorting to all possible meditations to shut up the never-ending clamoring dancing, playing, thoughts. Thought give birth to reality through us. So they have profound effect on us. On what we become. But yet we have not much control except to give context to our thoughts by state of worldly existence. And they start spinning in that color. To aid us deal with things.

It seems thoughts are more powerful than us. We are just executors.

How I can control thoughts? Can they be controlled? Looks like a wild monkey to chase. Who knows!

Observing the fragile universe. How it is working?

Nothing happens without someone wanting it to happen. Neither the wind blows, nor the volcanoes erupt. Not even the leaves fall off the tree without the wind rushing past them, and earth pulling them down. Something must trigger. Somebody must have thought of them. To me, it seems every single thing has its orgin in thoughts or wants. So, how did the universe creation got triggered? Randomly? Or someone deliberately and elaborately thought of it. Of perfect proportions of elements for life to exist on this planet? The location of sun, and the moon, and the planets. Why us got created? Someone must want us. To be who we are. This is apart from our evolutionary adaptations to the environment. Of what cosmic significance we are? Is there a role we are meant for? Lots of us, and lots of us. What are we gonna do? Purpose? What makes us seek purpose? Get Born, Eat, Procreate, Fight, Die, Is that it? Are we the thinker ourselves? How do we know?

We are a manifest of matter and energy which all the time transit into each other. What state of energy are we in?

The universe is slave to gravity and thought. Now what this angelic or devilish forces are? If you are the star, you can manipulate the environment around you. Create your own planets! And create any kind of life you want, choose your own elements.

Can our thoughts change the direction of universe? Temper, Tinker with it?

Who must have created thoughts? What would be the first thought? And in whom?

I remember the oft quoted saying what you think you become.. What if I am the universe?

Book about how to live life defiantly? There can be no book.

Observing the fragile universe. How it is working?
Your Mind and Body is an expression of urges
Break through the web of social conditioning, and experiment.
You and Universe? Separated, United.
Ways the universe rewards you.
Ways of universe: Be careful what you ask.
Power of thoughts? The origin of which you have no power.
Why do good to others? When should you stop?
Why Expressing Denial is painful?
Suppression is harmful, vent out your crap, do not sink, float, or you won't see anything else happening.
If selfishness feels good, why it is bad?
unconscious Processes against your conscious rules, whims
God, Ohh God! God Damn it! Who are we talking to? How do you get heard?
Why have fetishes? What could be they? How to enjoy?
Ever question Why me? Why I, I got fucked?
What Rocks? And why Rock Stars Rock?
What happens if we all die? No one to Pray? Does God exist then? For what?
Right or wrong? ummm, Get over it!
Extreme pain and extreme pleasure, rest is wait.
Running after Time? Make time run after you. Create times.
Free will? Experience various degrees of it. God can't mess with you even if He wanted to.
Fear? Noone is without it. Cling to your instincts, scream if you want to, run baby run!
Truth sets you free. Get out of prisons.
Walk with naked mind, no inhibitions.
Invent pleasure, and pain.
Invert pleasure, and pain, they have seeds of each other
society is just a system for those who stick with the default choices
Whatever thrills you, write about it.
What happens when you pray?
Doing Nothing, break off with your conditional impulses, freeing your mind.
Why free the mind? Why do you like music?
Internalizing Time, why it is bad?

Multiple Personality, why just 1?
What money can do, and what it can't
Imitating society, 99.99% of the time
Animal Goals, Simple Goals
Why I am not like the wire of the Guitar? The wing of the birds.
Everyone else is animal too, they just hide it too well
Humans don't like change, but it is inevitable, and for the good and the bad.
Enjoying the falling leaves, gravitation at work!
Tinker with thoughts?
Why everyone likes the alternate state of mind? Smoke, Alcohol, Music, Tobacco, Dance, Pot?
Bored from what?
Tons of regret, and Tons of guilt, and still room for more. We are made for it baby.
Cleanup emotional baggage how?
Love, Love, Love, Love, nothing better than it
Intention and Act
You are the King, the Queen
Why doing the same thing for someone else and not yourself makes it noble?
All this talk is mind, where is talk of the heart?
Freeing the mind is like Flying, developing wings, and having an aerial view
-Freeing the left mind, the right mind?
Living without mind, just by instinct like fishes and sparrows and squirrels
Rewiring? Is that possible?
Procastination